SOLO

I had to take the kids to church today on my own. I was geared up for the struggle but still could not believe what a train wreck it really was.

Here are our stats from the first hour of church:

Lauren's trips to the bathroom : 3

Baker's trips to the bathroom : 2

Bags of goldfish crackers upended on the floor : 1

Babies who fell and cracked their faces on a metal folding chair : 1

Minutes spent in the hallway : 50 (out of 70)

I gladly sent the kids to Primary and spent the Sunday School hour in the hall trying to entertain/control Cameron. It was like wrestling a bear. I thought my arm would fall off from holding her. I thought my feet would break from pacing the halls in heels. I couldn't stand the thought of having to do that for a third hour.

I decided to cut my losses, pick up the big kids and head home early.

Does it seem like, sometimes, your kids act worse when your spouse isn't around to help? Or is it just more overwhelming because you are handling it all on your own? I can't decide. Either way, it wasn't pretty.

It made me grateful that Brian gets to attend church with us and sit with us during the meeting -- not like people whose husbands sit on the stand or attend another ward for whatever reason.

I'm thankful I don't have to handle that every week.

I was also grateful for a friend who I quickly passed Cameron off to so I could take Baker to do his business (during the opening song, no less, so I knew this day was doomed). As soon as Cameron was out of my arms, she started screaming for me. The whole time I was in the bathroom with Baker, I could hear her crying. She finally stopped a minute before I came back into the hall where I found her on my friend's lap, happily eating animal crackers.

So, even in the midst of the chaos and frustration, there are things to be thankful for.

And I am thankful for that.